Know, Like, & Trust (Part 1)
Zane Safrit and I have corresponded about the simple truth of Know, Like, & Trust and decided to each take a whack at it with our keyboards. Part 1 will address getting to Know and Like someone and Zane will write about Trust in Part 2.
Generally, we all desire to be known and liked. As business people wanting to influence the market, we need to appreciate the rule that people prefer to say yes to individuals they know and like.
Becoming known is fairly easy these days with the number of networking opportunities and the number of social tools such as LinkedIn, Twitter, facebook, YouTube, and podcasts. So, how do we go from being known to being liked?
Let's look at what research tells us about liking and how we ethically employ this information to establish better relationships.
Physical attractiveness seems to create a halo effect that causes us to attribute other positive traits to people such as talent, kindness, and intelligence. Fortunately since most of us are average, there are many other factors. This is good to know so that we don't allow ourselves to be unduly influenced by someone because of their extraordinary good looks.
We like people who are Similar to us. This could be in the area of opinions, personality traits, dress, background or lifestyle. So open up a little bit. Don't compartmentalize your "business self" and your "non-business self." Let people get to know you.
A lot of people resist this idea, especially online. Who has not heard someone say, "I don't get Twitter (or facebook). I don't want to know what someone had for breakfast." Neither do I. But if they are eating at my favorite restaurant, I would find that interesting. Your online profiles and the conversations you participate in are perhaps the best way to show who you are and to develop relationships based upon similarities. Furthermore, when you run into people "in real life," there is more to talk about.
Praise and Compliments, when not crudely transparent, enhance liking. Learn to see people in such a way that you are able discover their unique quality and virtue. Then look for ways to tactfully acknowledge it.
One of the most powerful ways to compliment someone's intelligence or perspective is to listen to them speak and to ask questions to clarify and enhance understanding. Another is to introduce them to others in your network and share their successes. Online you can comment on their blogs, tweets, and facebook page.
Familiarity through repeated contact enhances liking. Simply put, get engaged and stay in front of people. Go where your prospects and customers are. If they are networking at the local Chamber of Commerce meetings, show up and talk with them. If they Tweet, you Tweet. Send a regular newsletter and include your picture.
Mutual and successful cooperation enhances liking. Volunteering with the Chamber of Commerce, being a member of a Rotary Club, or being on a non-profit board are all places where you can find opportunities for mutual and successful cooperation. From a sales or customer services approach, we should frame the issues in a way to promote the mutual cooperation to solve a client's need.
Finally, Association with positive things enhances liking. This could be an event such as a Halloween party a friend of mine has every year for his friends, neighbors, and clients or the Central Iowa Bloggers meet up the first Friday of every month or something simple like lunch. Breaking bread together has an unexpectedly powerful effect on liking.
As you can see, one can employ a strategy and tactics to enhance liking in their target market and it can be done with integrity and by being your real self.
For an in-depth treatment of these ideas, pick up Robert Cialdini's book Influence: Science and Practice.
Finally, share with us your thoughts and ideas regarding liking.
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